i vote no.

Pink paper hearts
Tissue paper hearts might i add
Easily ripped
Easily forgotten
Candy hearts
Billboards for cliches
Please don't kiss me unless you mean it
And who thought of, "email me"
It's lame. Bury it.
Dead roses.
You tried but the petals are still bruised
So just forget Valentine's Day
It's forced
It's painful
It's not worth it.

NEED.

How do i tell you that i NEED you
And not sound like a pathetic girl in a lame movie?
How do i tell you that i would've NEEDED you anyway
Even if i didn't like you
How do i tell you that this NEED is not fake or made up
Without scaring you away?
I NEED you
That's not gonna fade or change
Even if you don't NEED me too

Please?

Don't pat me on the back
Saying, "it'll all be ok"
Hold me tight in your arms
And tell me it's ok to hurt
Don't shy away from my tears
And awkwardly hand me a tissue
Cup your hands under my chin
And catch the droplets with your sleeve
Please don't tell me something i already know
It sounds so cliche and lame
Don't say anything--just be there
Let me rest in you for a bit
Don't feel like you have to cry with me
You can be a rock for all i care
Let me grasp onto you in my sea of emotion
And when i trip along across the ground
Hold my hand, fingers grasped tightly
Please?

spell it out for me.

e.x.p.l.o.s.i.o.n. cuz each letter deserves its own sentence. sensation of bones snapping from the pressure.the weight that hangs over me. ripping. shredding. tearing. pulling. muscles. bones. my heart. i whisper, "gone". and the air is knocked out of me. i'm knocked out of my chair. the tile is cool on my cheek. i feel my heartbeat echoing through the floor. r.e.v.e.r.b.e.r.a.t.e. my teeth chatter and i'm cold. i shrug into a sweatshirt. the one that's not your's. hugging myself. my arms aren't long enough. or strong enough. and they're not your's. the definition of pain floats around in my head. dictionaries don't know anything. define it all you want. but that's not how it plays out. real life is vivid. and real. and hurts. h.e.a.r.t.b.r.e.a.k. i'm not emo. i'm just emotional. so deal with it. i'll paint my nails navy blue and pretend its black if i want to. so get off my case. teeth clenched. hands in fists. i strain every muscle in my body, waiting for the wave of pain to hit. and then i'm heels over head over heels over head. ocean of pain. i wash up on the shore. and there's not relief. it just slams into me again. and again. and again. and again. oh just kill me now. but my heart keeps on beating. even though it's shattered. shocking. it survives. b.r.e.a.k.d.o.w.n. tears beat against my eyelids. clawing their way out of my eyes. they sneak down my cheeks. i'm too tired to wipe them away. too tired to care. or to announce their escape. they flow to my chin and drip off onto my hoodie. they ooze between my fingers and flow from my finger tips. drip. drip. drip. they don't stop. long past when i'm conscious of them. puddle jumping. running in the rain. memories with you. and the tears fall harder. stinging my skin. e.x.h.a.u.s.t.i.o.n. keeping on this mask takes work. plastic smile that isn't quite right. but it will do. it will have to. hollow eyes and a toothy grin. tin laughter. so fake. and i think of you. always telling me to be me. to be real. to place my identity in Christ. did i hear it? yes. and i have been me. but now. who am i? my identity is in Christ. and that's all i have left. you've stolen every other piece. our pinky promise is null and void. and the strongest promise of all is destroyed. i miss my best friend.

Air

Breathing?

Huh?

Seriously?

You expect me to breathe without my oxygen?

What an unreasonable request!

How dare you?!

Yet i know i'll attempt

To do it all alone

When I should get my air from God

Why am i such a girl?

I need an inhaler.

Not Allowed.

I'm not allowed to talk to you

I'm not allowed to see your face

I'm not allowed to speak your name

Or ask for your embrace

I no longer can call you on the phone

And no marathon emails

I can no longer check up on my best friend

I'm not allowed to even call you mine

Silence and space in between

Getting over you takes longer than a day

And a day is what i'll survive

The rest will drag and drag

I'm not allowed to send you a quick message 

To let you know i'm praying or dying

I have to wait til the worst is over

Til my heart can beat without your name echoing

Well, when you suggested this prolonged silence

I nodded once and let the tears fill up my eyes

I steeled myself for the pain to hit my heart

And it slammed into me like a wave in the ocean

Beat against me and knocked me off my feet

Tumbling head over heels over head over heels

And then i washed up on shore

I couldn't move. 

I think my heart is broken

I can't move.

Who knows when i'll be able to get up again

I took down all the pictures of us on the walls of my cell

I deleted all our songs and hastily hid your notes with the pictures

Far away from this room that now seems to be a prison

No light gets through the bars

I had all these hopes and dreams

I can't have them anymore

I'm not allowed and the contraband simply appears in my heart

Daydreams and the night time ones are off limits

I think my heart is broken.

I think it is.

Really and truly

I'm surprised it still manages to beat

My face can find some semblance of a smile

Somewhere

But my muscles don't feel like wasting energy on something i don't mean

I'm not allowed to talk to you?

What?

I....

can't.